Trust but Verify

Most mornings, I read the headlines in our local paper. Today and yesterday, our front pages highlight the injuries and deaths of 6 local high school students. 6 boys, all athletes either hurt or killed in shootings within a year's time. Shootings! What is going on here? Who's to blame? I look at a mother's picture on the front page. She is understandably distraught, her daughter consoling her. Her son was shot at 1am. He had been at a party. 1am?
I'm not so naive to think that my children are above any risks, but there had to be signs in these families! Yes, they'll let us down, they'll make mistakes. We all did! We all pray that our children will become happy, successful adults, but even despite our best efforts sometimes this does not happen. My parents were too permissive with me and I know from experience what kind of trouble can find you when you're a teenager.

I'm a strict parent and my kids still love me! Monitor you kids! Know their friends. Know where they are going. What could your teen possibly be doing past 11pm? Don't just set a curfew and let them loose. They need good, chaperoned activities available to them! Thanks to some wonderfully supportive parents, my church offers tons of teen gatherings. They still have opportunities to find their independence. Sure, we have disagreements. They have friends with less strict parents. We have discussions about these other lifestyles and I support my decisions with logical insight and God's plan. Sometimes I do give in to their pleas. I pray about it and then refer to the well known motto : Trust but Verify.
My oldest and I recently discussed what would be expected of him once he graduates. He plans to attend college, but likely will be living at home. He now knows that there will still be rules, curfews and expectations. It was easy to explain. I referred to Joshua 24:15. (It's my house and) as for me and my household, we will serve the Lord!

P.S. My heart goes out to the families of these young men and all other parents that have lost a child. I can't imagine the pain. I pray that God's loving arms bring you strength.

A Teen & A Toddler

One of them is breaking my back and the other one is breaking my heart.

I would give anything to be able to just go poop by myself! (Sorry about the "graphicness" of my words there.) The baby is glued to me. Or should I say that I'm glued to her? I really can't get enough of her. She's like sugar! But I sure could use one morning to sleep in. Or at the very least, one night of peaceful sleep for at least 9 hours. Ahhh. I dream...

And this teenager of mine! Argh! Actually I have two of them, but at the moment I've only had the urge to strangle one. "Calgon Take Me Away!" (I remember my mom saying that when I was younger) Or better yet, "Carnival Cruise Line, Take Me Away!"

Thanks Marty

It doesn't happen often, but once in a while, someone takes time out of their busy day to share some encouraging words with someone else. And the God part of that, is that it happens exactly when it is needed!

I've been struggling this week with a teenage dilemma. I have good kids, but this is part of growing up. In fact, I am more than grateful for the relatively small troubles that I've been faced with thus far. Yet, here I am, heartbroken that my son hasn't discovered the importance of good grades. This kid is a sponge! He has talent beyond my dreams, but homework isn't fun and therefore does not merit his full attention. You can imagine my frustration and despair.

Here's where God stepped in today...
I received an email from my buddy "Marty." She jumped right in with the humor, empathy and encouragement. In just that order too! Write that down... humor, empathy and then encouragement.
Humor is sometimes a touchy matter. It may not be a good idea to start w/ humor in a more serious matter, but in this case it was absolutely a necessity. Empathy, not everyone can relate to each other's problems, so if that is the case then go with sympathy instead. And the most important of all is encouragement! God is our finest encourager, but we have this power also. I don't know why we don't share it with others more often. Take some time today to be an encouragement to someone else. It's as easy as sending an email, making a phone call or just smiling at a stranger!

Lastly, I just have to share the humorous part of the email that Marty sent me...
"I heard one time that raising teens is like being pecked to death by chickens."
Isn't Marty a hoot?! Thank you Marty!

Baby Crying!

How many can relate to this...baby crying in the living room and teenagers arguing in another room.
Yes, I have a 16 year old, 13 year old, a 10 year old and a 1 year old. What a gap? I'm finding that it's not as uncommon as I thought. I met a man yesterday at the pool. He has a 27 year old and a 4 year old. What are we thinking?
Ok, so with me I married at 22, had 3 children within about 6 years. Divorced when I was 30, remarried a great guy and voila...another kid. :)
I plan to write more details in posts to come, but that's the condensed version.